What have you done for me lately?

I used to love Janet!

Things for me lately have been very good.  I have been loving the feeling every day when I wake up, and realize that I get to workout today!  I get excited every morning (and every night before I go to bed) knowing that I get to exercise...  is that normal?  I guess it depends who are...  I have been so very lucky to have been able to bounce back so quickly with this baby.  I was going to post a pic of me after a run, but I just can't, too vain, too fat right now!  Although I can be proud to have gone from 170 to 138 in 6 weeks, I still have 15 more pounds to go. 

I am super pleased to announce that I have kept very consistent with my T25 workouts.  I have made it to week 4!  I'm one week away from completing the first part of the program, then there is 5 more weeks.  That's one further than my last post-pregnancy firm-up.  This time I have been tracking my progress, using their cheesy little chart.  I do admit that measuring my weight, waist, chest, arms and thighs every week have kept me more honest and more focused on eating right and exercising.  It really helps. 

The weight loss has stalled, but the inches are still dropping, especially in the waist.  So I keep optimistic about staying the course. 

I have also been running, about 3-5 times a week.  It is hard to do a T25 workout (or two sometimes I double them up) then go for a run.  You do a sh*t-tonne of squats and jumping in those workouts!
Running is very slow, but time on the feet is good, so I'll keep at it.  I have high hopes about being a fast runner once more. 

Life as a mom of two has been a fast adjustment.  Hilary is now 7weeks old and she is still a dream.  Happy and smiling and sleeping like a champ.  So no walking mom-zombie for me, I feel well-rested every day (which is a good thing because running around after Reed can be tough!). 

A few pics, from a while back now...

Here we are right after birth, well right after they weighed and dressed her... She was born at 7pm and we were home by 1030pm, no joke!  That's one of the perks of having a midwife, you can go home and sleep in your own bed!

And here is Reed meeting his new baby sister for the first time...  I love that little man!

 

Easter morning egg-hunt...

There's a baby wrapped in there...

Throwing rocks at Elbow Falls...

What a sweet little peanut!

 

I love my family!

The last couple months...

A lot has happened.  Firstly our daughter Hilary Ada was born on the 12th of April.  I may do a separate post about the labour -- which was a breeze compared with Reed and this time I did it sans epidural or any pain management drugs!  This is saying a lot for how bad my first labour was...

Hilary is a joy.  So far she is an 'angel' baby, she's one month old now and has been sleeping like a dream.  Sometimes I forget she's even around!  "Oh ya! I have another child here!" I often say to myself during the day as I am chasing Reed around, trying to successfully parent/survive a two-year old...

Sideways.. darn-it!

She sleeps through night so far, and I am waiting for it to get worse...

What else... well my post partum recover has been really good also.  I was able to do 10min treadmill runs in the third week after, and started my T25 workouts last week (I'll blog more about this later).  I am just feeling very happy to be able to get a sweat going again.  I have missed exercising terribly, and am suffering the consequences now.  Not so much the cardio, or even muscle tiredness, but the weight I gained. 

I topped out at 170lbs!  That's a 43lbs weight-gain!  Holy Dina!  So needless to say, confidence is a little low and feeling like I am at the bottom of a long slow hard climb back to an acceptable weight.

Good news = I am already down to around 140.  The first part was easy though, it just came off without any work.  It has slowed down now.  I have made a few diet changes, namely eat mostly from the fruit and vegetable food group.  I have also cut out bread and cheese (still eating other grains and other dairy, but had to make some sacrifices...) I am not kidding when I say I had pizza at least once a week when pregnant, not to mention the nightly cheese and peanut butter sandwich I ate before bed!!  My little princess just wanted her carbs and fat!

And lastly... Spring is finally starting to spring... the bulbs I planted last fall are starting to come up! YAY!

Thursday food planning

Not "foodie-Friday" like most blogs because Reed is in daycare Thursday, so this is when I get a bit of time...  maybe "Food-think Thursday"...

I've decided to start planning out my meals, get organized.  I find there is nothing worse than looking at the clock late into the afternoon, and then scrambling in the cupboards and freezer to see what I can pull together.  The hardest part is just thawing the meat, we have decided to get rid of our microwave and so no more quick thaw.

Since Colin started hunting, we do have a lot of meat, a lot of deer and elk (ground, cubed, sausage, salami...).  I feel really good that most of the meat we eat is so conscientiously (and locally!) harvested.  I am not sure I could go hunting myself... Colin asks me to come, he says there is nothing like it.  But the idea of sitting in one spot for hours in the cold (November) and just waiting... No not for me, I'd be consumed with thoughts about all the things I could be getting done at home.  Not to mention the actually act of shooting or witnessing the animal die.  Yes, it is sad.  But perhaps not as sad as the way in which most of the animals have spent their entire existence which we purchase at the grocery store.  At least I can be sure that this animal has lived a good life in the wild. 

Reed is waking up...

The point is the meal planning..

Here is my week of meals:


Thursday - Taco salad (my all-time fave)

Friday - elk spaghetti (Reed eats 'noo-noos' like nobodys business)

Saturday - chicken fajita

Sunday - Italian elk sausage and quinoa salad ... http://the-healthy-wife.com/a-new-recipe-kale-quinoa-sweet-potato-salad/

Monday - breakfast for dinner, scrambler or something..

Tuesday - salmon

Wednesday - pork chops (so not my fave, but Colin likes them)

Swimming lessons take 2

Reed's second set of swimming lessons started today ... they did not go very well!

Reasons why:

1.  He has been going through a "mommy" phase lately.  Not sure why this has started, might have to do with me being home more, or it's just another phase he's going through. 

2.  He has also been going through a whiny, cry a lot phase, which has Colin and I very frustrated.  The last thing we want is a cry-baby!  Hoping it's just a phase...

3.  He goes to the very regularly, so not sure why the huge fuss this morning.  He goes almost week with grandma, and I take him to family swim on the weekends, and since I've been off work, we have been going an extra 1-2 times a week!  Maybe because he had to leave his beloved baby wading zone and forced to play with things like sponges... it threw him off.  Lately his initial reaction to everything is "no" or "I don't want to", so following a group was not happening!

4.  Last night he had a sleep over at 'yamma yampa's' aka grandma and grandpa's, so another possible reason for the extreme crankiness today...

I decided to watch, part of my "stop being a momma's boy" plan.    So dad got to enjoy the 30min of whining, "I want mommy", and general unhappiness...

 Death-grip on dad, not wanting to join the class in the "big" part of the pool...

 Temporarily appeased with blowing bubbles...

"I'm a little tea-pot" got him going for a bit, this is one our favourites during bath time.

Here's hoping that next week will be more enjoyable...

My favourite little man

Not to be confused with my favourite big man...

Being off work means our mornings are a little more enjoyable.  There isn't a pressing time frame we need to stick to like wake up, breakfast, get dressed, and get out the door, with many, many power struggles and or tantrums interspersed throughout!  It is hard, having to be out the door before 7am with a toddler, who is in the middle of discovering stubbornness independence.  I was usually driving to work already stressed out! 

Now most of our mornings can be more relaxed, with some playing in our "dammas" (aka pyjamas).  Reed does however continue to go to daycare two days a week, which I consider to be essential for both mommy and Reed, so I continue to follow some structure and routine in our day.  Daycare is essential; I need some free time (me-time) and Reed needs to be his own independent little man with his friends and caregivers. 

This morning we played and mommy wasn't just pretending to play, because she was really busy doing something else, like getting herself ready, or cleaning up breakfast etc etc.  You know the "pretend playing", where you have a little car in your hand and intermittently roll it on the ground or the counter or wherever you are, and you sporadically throw out: "Hey buddy!  How's it going?  Let's go to the car wash!" or whatever is appropriate for the chosen toys...  I'll also often "pretend" play during bath time, when I'm simultaneously cleaning the sink/toilet/floor...I know, I know, multitasking is terrible, I should give complete undivided attention to playtime ... But he doesn't even notice (flash forward fifteen years from now, psychiatrist office ... "My mom never paid attention to me or cared about my games ...") and let's be honest, the house needs to be cleaned, this is a reality and I have more than put in my share of playing cars or trains! 

Anyways this morning I was actually playing, enjoying my morning tea and my favourite little man...

 Did I mention he loves the camera?  After one pic, he wanted to pose for more...

 

And then one more with his favourite bear and bunny...

I think my mom has trained him with her constant picture taking, he happily calls out "Cheese!" and them says "more!".

Yesterday I actually swam 3k...

That's about all I have to say about that...! 

Never mind that it took me 1.5 hours, and that I was out of commission the rest of the day (not entirely true, I did take the dog for 2 walks totally 1:45 of walking), but I actually swam a respectable distance!

I am currently 36 weeks into this pregnancy and of course the last month is the toughest, you can see the light, you're almost there, but you have to lug this giant mass on your belly around for another month.

To make it worse, you actually say to yourself that "the baby could arrive any day now!"  But let's be honest, Reed took his sweet time to make his big debut, hanging in there for an extra 10 days, chances are this little darling will extend / overstay her welcome in the cozy womb!

Tomorrow is our "home visit" with the midwife, fingers crossed I can bring this little gem (or HAM which my sister kindly noticed her initials will spell...!) into the world in the comfort of our own home.   It would be nice, but I am not stuck on any idea, I am going to do what feels right when the moment arrives... all is calm, let's just carry on, or get me to the hospital I need an epidural...

Hurry up and wait!

Losing the weight - Part 1

This is a hot topic regarding pregnancy, very hot.  Moms to be stress over the pounds that are adding up over the nine months... and there is no stopping this cravings! 

I have seen those women who have managed to keep the weight from going anywhere but their bellies.  These people are the exception, not the rule and cause the rest of us 'normal' people to fret and fuss for nine long months about how fat our arms, legs, butt, backs, ankles, faces, boobs, armpits ....

The first time, with Reed I gained a solid 40 lbs, above the recommended total gain (30-35 lbs) and I stressed everyday.  It took me a good 8 months to shed it all completely.  Most of it came off within 3-4 months, but those pesky 5 extra pounds were very tough.  An aside comment - your body is never the same, even if the scale says you're back, things are different.  For me it was my tummy, the muscles were so stretched out that they always sat further out than before, and then there is the skin of the tummy, not so smooth and tight as before...

And I was doing a lot of exercise!  Swim, bike, run everyday, I averaged 1-1.5 hours a day of exercise and it still took 8mos!  Mind, I wasn't watching what I ate...

This time I am making a shorter deadline for weight loss.  I have gained pretty much the same with this pregnancy as with the first.  So I intend on watching what I eat this time! Not a diet!

As like the first time, I will start with a dvd workout program.  I heard a athlete-mom (Olympic athlete) talk about the right way to get back into shape, and she said the most important is to regain the strength first, then the fitness.  This made a lot of sense to me.  I need to get an overall strength back into my core, my legs, my arms etc, it is amazing how much muscle you lose over the nine months.

So with that end, I got suckered into trying the next program put out after Insanity (which I never fully completed... only ever to complete the first month on two attempts...).  It's called T25, and you only have to do 25mintues per sessions, five days a week!  This I thought is totally manageable, being wary of how I will handle a brand new baby and a toddler, this seems like something I can commit to. 

So Part 1 of Operation Weight Loss =  May and June will consist of dvd workouts and getting back into easy running.

Part 2 - and Part 3 coming soon...

After the baby comes...

A friend once said: "You know, after you have the baby, you will actually have the baby..."

At first this got me mad!  It was, in my mind, a nay-sayer sort of comment.  I was so pumped about all the races I was planning and how fit I was going to be again (pregnancy does this to me, makes me feel like I am revving my engines and running on the spot going no where!).  And he drops this negative bomb on me...

But of course now I see the wisdom, after doing it once, getting back out to the races post-baby, I did see the many many issues that present themselves while trying to juggle it all.  I did see how many moms give up, and give in to the endless excuses of why they can't get anything done for themselves.

For me, the tipping point of dropping into the abyss of not being able to do anything for myself (read - exercise  - which is the only "thing for myself" I put any real value into), was full-time work (as a kindergarten teacher!) while being pregnant. 

I think everyone has that point where they can no longer manage trying to do it all. 

But now, I have a full year ahead of me.  I plan on making the most of it (read, getting in a lot of exercise!) because who knows what the future will bring, so you gotta go when you feel good.  This time around I am placing more stress on losing the weight quickly, but less stress on getting in race shape.  I am not going to set any big target races this summer, but will wait a full year to get back into competing. 

Back to basics or swimming first-timer

My last day of work was Friday, so I am now officially off, on maternity leave.  Our baby girl arrives sometime first week of April, and I have a big long list of things to get done and about 6weeks to go...

I have a wonderful week ahead of me filled with Susanne-time, Reed is either at daycare or with his loving grandparents.  There was once a time when I would feel guilty if I had a day to myself, and farmed Reed out... not so any more.  I just feel lucky!

First swim in a very long time, over a year to be kinda exact (not including the two swims I did over the holidays), and I am allowing myself to say that there has been zero exercise in eight months, and as my friend put it, I have been in a state of "cognitive dissonance" - where I am living a life I do not recognize to be me.

It was super fantastic.  Yes I am almost 40 pounds heavier and have a gigantic sail of a belly slowing me down, but I felt fantastic to be swimming again.

I was a sight. Having not been in the pool for a very long time, I was back to basics and looking very "first-timer"...

 I had no swim cap, so short hair was tied up with elastic and bobbypin, but it still was all over my face.  I had no suitable swimsuit (my maternity suit from last pregnancy was thrown out due to becoming see-through), so I wore bikini bottoms from a suit I have had since 2year university (aka very stretched out to fit over larger bottom!) and two sports bras given to me by my sister.  I did wear goggles, found at the lost 'n found, and I did keep them (they are cheap ones, but fit so nicely!)  People were looking...  I forgot a water bottle, so before and after I sipped water from my hands at bathroom sink.  (I also washed myself with the "luxury" hand soap provided by the facility!)  I have always prided myself on being a minimalist triathlete, as in, the bigger the bag/the more toys/the more crap, does not necessarily equate to being fast, but this was a bit much for even me.  Next swim I will take a water bottle (getting dehydrated while pregnant, leads to killer headaches and lots of Braxton hicks contractions later in the day) and I have now found a swim cap in our basement, I may even bring my own soap and shampoo!

I did swim 2k, and the lady I shared a lane with commented that I was faster even with a baby.  That did wonders to my ego.  Thank you lady, these are the small victories that I cherish!

Afterwards when I was getting changed, there were a couple moms with tots getting ready for swim lessons.  I almost felt guilty for being there for my own selfish reasons, but quickly got over that and felt lucky to be able to have the chance to swim on my own!  (Reed is starting his second set of lessons next month, so that helped ease the guilt...)

The rest of the day consisted of going for a wonderful long walk with Race and cleaning up/out the basement to make a nice workout area for Colin and I.

New blog, first post

It is time for beginnings, 2014.  It has been a year, or more since I blogged, I've been lost in the fog of a life moving too fast, too busy, too crazy even for any self-reflection ... self-fulfillment ... even self-awareness! 
I know I don't blog for my many followers, I do it more for myself.  The writing is therapeutic, and it is mine.  And right now, there is not a lot I can call my very own! 

My new blog will be a space for me to continue to challenge myself to be selfish.   Namely, I want to regain the essential part of my identity which has been missing for a little while ... fitness, health, competition.  I don't want to be a martyr anymore, complaining about how I sacrifice for my job and family, raising a toddler.  So yesterday while driving in the car with Colin, after actually having gone to the pool and swam by myself, I declared my new years resolution: "I'm going to be more selfish!"

Lately, I've been working my spirit to bone, teaching kindergarten, raising a toddler and being pregnant, leaves NO energy left for me.  And it has sucked, so I have two more months of work until I'm off on mat leave and I couldn't be more excited to end the "All work, no play" chapter in my life. 

 

But first a few pics... (I know not a good start for my selfish endeavour!)

We took these in the fall, our first attempt at family photos... thanks to mom for taking them!  Even though we were too late for the colourful leaves, they still look pretty good.

 

I'm dressed ready for a funeral... trying to look as small as possible! Not easy in the first half of pregnancy, you just look fat before your belly "pops".

 

This one is my favourite!  Reed and dad having fun... but look who's grumpy-pants in the background! It makes me laugh every time!

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